User:Jrossi4r

jrossi4r is a former Solid Gold dancer who currently works as a freelance astronaut. She recently discovered that her name should actually be jrossi3r. Fortunately, it's obscure enough that no one has called her on it.

She is extremely hilarious in a droll sort of way, and some of us hope to be adopted by her.

jrossi4r is a cool woman who got away with a cheap-shot cross-check on that sissy Hugh Janus in the championship game that caused him internal bleeding, temporary gender identification issues and a permanent vague existential sort of angst.

Extremely Funny Things jrossi4r Has Said

• If an apocalyptic event happens, it's very likely that my cat caused it. He's that kind of evil.
• All this happiness is making me horny, but I have to wait another month to get it on. The doctors call it "vaginal rest" but I prefer the term "vajayjaycation."
• Right now he's quite jaundiced, which makes him look like an Oscar. Every time someone hands him to me, I thank the Academy.
• Honey, please get the pteradactyl out of your crotch.
• Aaaaand...now he's trying to eat the cat.
• My child, though funny and adorable, is not a LOL cat.
• It reminds me of my daughter running away from our cat (then a kitten) and screaming, "No kitty! No biting! I AM NOT TAAASTY!!!!!!"
• I believe that on ancient Yetipotamian keyboards, the space bar was used to actually launch things into space. Is anything missing from your office?
• "Oh. Hyenas got her?"
• Little dude...if chewing on something hurts you, then STOP CHEWING ON IT!! God, babies are so very, very stupid.
• Nothing is more romantic than a sparkly diamond on an orange-stained finger.
• He is the Jesus fish! Affix his likeness to your car!
• Arguing with Nader apologists is like arguing with my kindergartener.
• I don't like touching really, really breakable things that just came out of someone's crotch!